I received this Message of Love the Monday before Thanksgiving, 2015.
It coincided with the Path To Holiday Bliss I was offering that same night.
It really touches upon how we get hurt while growing up yet how we can choose love and compassion and be completely our authentic selves, even with family members at holiday gatherings.
When you grow up, you have various family restrictions out upon you.
These are thought to be lessons in love, but often times they become lessons in following the rules, and feeling terrible about breaking the rules.
They become lessons in shame, blame, guilt and embarrassment rather than lessons of love.
We end up being unable to be ourselves for children need to be ‘seen not heard’.
So we stop having fun.
We stop being our true self because when we are our true self, we laugh, we giggle, we create, and we disrupt the ever so important agenda that our parents might have.
This behavior creates a wound as we get punished for laughing at the wrong time, for speaking our minds or sharing our feelings at someone else’s perceived wrong time.
‘I will give you something to cry about!’
It is never wrong at any time to express ones emotions.
We need to be free to share them rather than bury them.
We get criticized for being our true selves and we start to put on a mask of who we really are.
We feel abandoned and spend years protecting ourselves from this feeling of abandonment.
Usually at age 7 or so is when we really get stifled away from what is intuitively us.
We become more of who our family wants us to be and start following more of those rules which mold us, but then keep us from being our own true selves.
All this molding and rule following just instills a level of judgement.
We grow up then judging others based on their behavior whether it was different than our upbringing.
‘Why can’t you be good like xxx’s kids??’
Then we feel guilty and embarrassed as we don’t compare to those another’s ‘angelic ‘ behaving kids.
Yet, these angelic kids have been traumatized in a way that when they grow up, they may pass on that same judgement to their families, and their friends which become a new kind of family.
They feel comfortable only with those who are ‘playing by the rules’ and have well behaved children. They only feel comfortable being with people who can ‘follow rules’.
None of them knowing that the pain and wounds being created are causing such turmoil among family events later on in life. And turmoil within themselves as they walk around wearing masks to disguise who they really are.
We truly just want to be our authentic selves.
Our parents and family want what they think is best for us.
They stop asking you why you are doing anything and trying to understand you; they are too busy focused on what it is they think they want to portray and how it is they want to be seen.
They don’t express their emotions for fear of criticism.
They don’t share their dreams, aspirations or fears and failures for fear of criticism.
And the cycle continues.
If you want to break this cycle, you must be the one who starts the conversation and stands up for what it is you want, that which makes your heart sing.
Your heart’s desire is to be loved the way you are for the person YOU really are.
You expose your vulnerability and emotions to help others understand you better.
Not the conditional love you have learned to expect.
I will only love you if….you are good… if you do as I say….if you ….follow my rules.
But unconditional love means you love the good, the bad, the ugly and the beautiful.
You just love it all.
We can just love it all. Love ourselves first, then others.
In this process of learning who loves for what reason, we become less of who we really are. We somewhere learn to be our authentic self and start peeling the layers of the mask off. The mask of who we think we should be so that we get the love from family.
But this mask is too restrictive. It is not really fun.
The mask puts us on the defensive and walking on egg shells trying to comply and set up our defenses for the next attack.
When we are truly ourselves, we don’t have to comply.
We just get to be.
And who we really are, are beings of love and compassion.
We learn compassion for ourselves, then we learn compassion for others.
We grow in love for ourselves and are able to turn the chatter of family rules off so we can become ourselves and love who we are, what we stand for and how we look, dress, eat, behave and live our lives.
Once we fully get there, then we can have fun with family, friends who are like family and everyone we meet. We will have the ability to see love in every being including ourselves, and share the love, rather than sharing the fear of criticism.
Be who you really are.
Stand up for what you believe in even if it means being alone until others figure it out, too and join you.
Be love, share love, teach others to love themselves first.
Then it will spread.
With love, Wayne John and Archangel Michael
If you would like to receive your own Message of Love, please call Joanna to schedule your private Divine Ego or Path To Freedom session. She can also channel the message and send you a transcript if that is easier.
These messages are all created to teach us about unconditional love while here on Earth and how to connect with our own hearts desires.
You may also choose to come to one of the Path To Your Heart sessions where we can receive messages or other insight as to how we can clear the blocks to our authenticity.